John Logie Baird invented the television in 1925 and revolutionised the way people looked at the world. Let me list for you what this brilliant invention has achieved over the years.
- I'm sure it brought a smile to many a face during the Great Depression.
- When the Enola Gay dropped its payload on Hiroshima, it showed us the grim reality of war.
- Emotions were literally brought to life with the advent of Technicolor.
- "WOODSTOCK" Need I say more?
- How can I forget Cartoons, which played a very vital role in my formative years.
- Movies, Sitcoms,News etc etc...
The list is endless. I think its one of the greatest inventions of the 20th Century.
Then, on the 7th of the 6th in 1970, a girl was born whose father at the time was popularly known as Jumping Jack Flash. She was named EKTA. I have no idea how she was brought up however I envision it to be something like this:
Dropped on the head when she was born. Then the good doctor proceeded to slap her derriere one too many times. She was never breast fed hence never received the right sort nutrients required to develop a brain. She was never sent to school but rather to a boot camp because she had caused her mother too much labour pain. She married at the age of 11 and her husband tried to burn her because she tortured his mother. She was divorced by the age of 12 and decided to carry on at boot camp. At the ripe age of 15, she married an alcoholic who committed suicide because she drank more than him. However, he was able to consummate the marriage and she gave birth to a beautiful she-male who is now learning the ropes in Thailand.
When she turned 18, Mr Flash(daddy) decided that it was time that his daughter attended college to break her monotonous & pitiful existence. College was no different for the poor girl. She hadn't given up alcohol and since she had visited her son/daughter in Thailand, she had turned into a nyphomaniac. Infact, in college, she was known as "Free Willy."
After being done by the entire college, she decided to foray into the world of Television. She was made creative director of Balaji Telefilms due to the fact that she had been through so much in her life(and since probably since no one else wanted the job). Imagine telling your friends " I WORK FOR BALAJI" Yipee!!! Then in the late ninety's she produced a serial called "Kyun Ki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi" which when translated into english means "The Most Ludicrous Piece Of Shit Ever To Be Screened." The story revolved around Tulsi who is married into the most obscenely dressed family ever. She is the quintessential housewife i.e subservient as defined by our glorified culture so they say. She is a good person as defined by the amount of make up she wears and her Mother in Law could be good or bad depending on the situation and the type of saree she's wearing. The show influenced a lot of people across the country and prompted husbands telling their wives to be like Tulsi. If I were a feminist I would have hacked her and fed her to the pigs. Unfortunately I'm not because that has it's own set of complications.
As you can see I have nothing against Ekta. I feel very strongly for Mr Baird who must be turning in his grave thinking of what one morally defunct and delluded woman has used his invention for. As you can see that she went through a lot of shit but then so do pigs but atleast you can kill and eat them.
Don't fret Mr Baird, she will grow old and weary and then probably this so called creativity of hers will just vanish. I will wait for that day.
9 comments:
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Question: What does this mean?
Answer: Anekta mein Ekta!
(On a more serious note, excellent, humourous, full of malice... Just the way I like it!)
wah!!!fantastic job my friend...the inventor of tv turns in his grave and the viewers have started diggin theirs...ekta kya tum kuch nahin dekhta??!!
Don't know much about the subject to comment much. Good article. Optimal doses of malice and other derogatories that bring to surface the author's narcissistic / masochistic traits. Key take-aways :
1) "Formative" - I like that
2) Mention of lots of illicit, nasty and alternative sex
Very good effort. Now, write something for me about my boss with equal or more doses of hatred and decimation.
I dare say, Mr. Ghumman a rather insightful journey into the labyrinth of your deep-seated malevolence t'ward the idiosyncratically melodramatic depiction of the struggles of the Indian family…in other words… rather “whack” if I may say so myself.
First, it's deluded, with a single L. Secondly, I hate to break it to you, but it's not vanishing from the world anytime soon - even if taken off air in India, it's the latest thing in Afghanistan. They telecast it in Dari (hilarious!), and apparently work, traffic and life in general grind to a complete halt at 8:30 p.m. Sources say Smriti Irani's face will soon adorn as many posters and billboards in Kabul, as Ahmad Shah Massoud.
That apart, fun post - you have a wild imagination, and lots of free time, evidently.
We are calibrated on this one !!!
I liked the title a lot.
did'nt know you followed the K-Series religiously in order to write this!!i liked it a lot...specially the title!!
i liked...infact..i "LOVED" the title..
funny and well witten..truly LOVED every bit of it..and as far as
the "K" serials are concerned..THERE SEEMS TO BE NO END IN SIGHT!!!!
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